Friends .. How many of us have them?

Friends... How many of us have them?

“Friends, how many of us have them? Friends, ones you can depend on?” These are the lyrics to a popular song from back in the day by Whodini entitled “Friends”. I have been studying the life of David for the past couple of months and each time I have read about the interactions between David and Jonathan those lyrics pop into my mind and I can’t help but wonder… Friends, how many of REALLY do have them? Friends, ones we really can depend on. This made me reflect on the people that I give the title of Friends to as I taught on the relationship between Jonathan and David.

Let’s do a background recap … David and Jonathan’s friendship began after David killed the Philistine Goliath. David was bring his brothers something to eat while they were at battle when he overheard Goliath “talking smack” (as one of my youth put it) to the Israelite army and to David’s surprise they were running away from Goliath. David was bothered by this and so he volunteered to DEFEAT Goliath. After all this was over Saul was so impressed with David that he decided to keep David in his service and not allow him to go home. It is at this point that Jonathan and David’s friendship begins. There are a few points I would like to bring out as it relates to the people we call friends based on what I have studied so far. Jonathan is the PERFECT example of a friend. Through he and David’s friendship many characteristics of a TRUE friend are on display. Let’s look at a few.

POINT 1: A TRUE friend loves you as himself.

“Jonathan thought as much of David as he did of himself…” 1 Samuel 18:1 (Contemporary English Version)

One of the qualifiers for a true friend is that they will think as much of you as they do of themselves. When someone has this type of feeling towards you if means that if anything happens to you it happens to them as well… GOOD or BAD. There was something about David that created a desire within Jonathan to want to be the one in David’s life that he could count on no matter what. I am sure that after witnessing something as awesome as David defeating Goliath, Jonathan knew that this was somebody he had to know on a personal level. Whatever David had working in his favor (GOD) Jonathan wanted too. This leads to a question… an evaluation… Do the people we label as friends… the ones we commit ourselves to, have GOD working in their favor? If not what is it that keeps you in the friendship?

POINT 2: When you live a transparent life TRUE friends have your back… No matter who it is!

“The next morning, Jonathan reminded Saul about the many good things David had done for him. Then he said, ‘Why do you want to kill David? He hasn’t done anything to you. He has served in your army and has always done what’s best for you. He even risked his life to kill Goliath. The Lord helped Israel win a great victory that day, and it made you happy.’” 1 Samuel 19:4-5 (Contemporary English Version)

Not long after Jonathan and David promise to be loyal friends Saul, who was Jonathan’s father becomes jealously angry when he misinterprets the praises of the women in the towns of Israel. Saul then begins to attempt to take David’s life. In the 19th chapter of 1 Samuel Saul tells Jonathan along with a few other officials to go and find David and kill him but Jonathan talks to his Dad and pleads David’s case. Jonathan could have easily gone along with his Father’s plan but instead he stood up for his friend because he did nothing wrong to deserve such punishment. Instead he helped David hide from his father until he found out why he was trying to kill him.

Many of us have people in our lives that we label as friend but when we are in danger and they know about it do they let us know? Do they plead our case or do they simply join in the conspiracy? Jonathan showed great courage because his FATHER, the one who is supposed to be setting an example is actually wrong in his actions, and Jonathan was brave enough to confront his Father RESPECTFULLY about why he was trying to kill David.

POINT 3: When friends are loyal to their commitment to you they are really learning to be loyal to God.

“But if he wants to harm you, I promise to tell you and help you escape. And I ask the Lord to punish me severely if I don’t keep my promise. I will pray that the Lord will bless you, just as he used to bless my father.” 1 Samuel 20:13
(Contemporary English Version)

Jonathan continues to keep his promise to David. By the time you get to the 20th chapter of 1 Samuel Saul has tried to kill David several times only to be unsuccessful. David asks Jonathan what he has done to Saul that he is out to kill him. Jonathan assures David that he will not let Saul kill him. He was so serious about helping David that he said if he doesn’t he asked that the Lord punishes him severely. If this is not evidence of a loyal friend I don’t know what is!

Jonathan recognized that God was helping David. He may not have known the specifics of why God was helping him but by this time he knew that God had something to do with David’s situation. TRUE friends honor God by honoring their commitment to you. David was helping Jonathan learn to honor God by keeping his promise. True friends make us better… True friends bring us closer to God… True friends give us hope that God helps those who trust and honor him. I am learning through Jonathan and David’s friendship that TRUE friend do things for each other that others would never do. True friends exemplify the characteristics of Jesus.

“Friends, how many of us have them? Friends, ones you can depend on?”

© Copyright June 16,2009 LaTrisha E. Milton